SCHOOL JOKES

1
Mother: “Did you enjoy your first day at school?”

Girl: “First day? Do you mean I have to go back there tomorrow?

2
Teacher: Nick, what is the past participle of the verb “to sing”?
Nick: “What do you think it is, Sir?”
Teacher: “I don’t think, I KNOW!”
Nick: “I don’t think I know either, Sir!”

3
PUPIL: “Would you punish me for something I didn’t do?”
TEACHER: ” Of course not.”
PUPIL: “Good, because I haven’t done my homework.”

4
A teacher asked a student to write 55.
Student asked: How?
Teacher: Write 5 and beside it another 5!
The student wrote 5 and stopped.
Teacher: What are you waiting for?
Student: I don’t know which side to write the other 5!

5
Little Johnny: Teacher, can I go to the bathroom?
Teacher: Little Johnny, MAY I go to the bathroom?
Little Johnny: But I asked first!

6
Student: Sir, what is an idiot?
Teacher: An idiot is a person who tries to explain his ideas in such a strange and long way that another person who is listening to him can’t understand him. Do you understand me?
Student: No.

7
Teacher: Why are you late?
Student: There was a man who lost a hundred dollar bill.
Teacher: That’s nice. Were you helping him look for it?
Student: No. I was standing on it.

8
Bank Teller: How do you like the money?
English Student: I like it very much.

9
Teacher: Do you have trouble making decisions?
Student: Well…yes and no.
The teacher to a student: Conjugate the verb “to walk” in simple present.

The student: I walk. You walk…
The teacher interrupts him: Quicker please.
The student: I run. You run…

10
S1: Look at your face I know what you had for breakfast
S2: Really? What was it?
S1: Eggs. S2: No, that was yesterday!

11
Teacher: Did you father help you with your homework?
Student: No, he did it all by himself!
Teacher: What are some products of the North of Iran?

Student: I don’t know.
Teacher: Of course, you do. Where do you get tea from?
Student: We borrow it from our neighbor!

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